Happiness

Here I go waxing philosophic when I should be waxing the Chevy. Every Christmas we are flooded with expectations of sugar plums dancing in our heads, wonderful family gatherings where everyone gets along,

peace, joy, and love for all mankind. It has come to my attention that this is not the case for everyone. For years we would go to a holiday gathering where the lady of the house set a high and arbitrary standard for everyone else. Everyone had to follow her protracted agenda and utter oohs and ahhs at the appointed time. The gathering was not about the family but about her.  After a drink or five, you never knew what she would say or who she would insult but you knew it was coming. It was one person's weight, another's job, someone's housekeeping, etc. Eventually, everyone got a turn and the evening generally ended with her being pissed that everyone did not want to be trotted down to her church and picking a fight with her husband. Many a feeling was hurt and holiday ruined. One year Tina and I decided that we had a foolproof solution. We realized that we no longer loved this woman enough to let her bother us. It was a Christmas miracle. They say forgiveness is a gift you give yourself and this worked the same way. An insult not responded to dies pretty quickly. Just let it roll off like water on a duck.Thanks for your input. I'll take that under advisement. The only power she had to hurt us was power we had given her. Lord knows she had her own demons to deal with and they drove much of her behavior. She had the makings of a nice life but spent a lot of it being miserable and freely sharing her misery with others. There are happy people in this world. Some have everything, some have nothing. Some are young and healthy, some old and feeble, some have had their bodies shattered by war.What I believe they have in common is that they are as happy as they have decided to be. Living well is the best revenge. Smile, it will make your friends glad and drive your enemies crazy. Decide to be happy. Here is one of my favorite Shel Silverstein poems. Merry Christmas.

It's All the Same to the Clam - Shel Silverstein

You may leave the clam on the ocean's floor,

It's all the same to the clam.

For a hundred thousand years or more,

It's all the same to the clam.

You may bury him deep in mud and muck

Or carry him 'round to bring you luck,

Or use him for a hockey puck,

It's all the same to the clam.

You may call him Jim or Frank or Nell,

It's all the same to the clam.

Or make an ashtray from his shell,

It's all the same to the clam.

You may take him riding on the train

Or leave him sitting in the rain.

You'll never hear the clam complain,

It's all the same to the clam.

Yes, the world may stop or the world may spin,

It's all the same to the clam.

And the sky may come a'fallin' in,

It's all the same to the clam.

And man may sing his endless songs

Of wronging rights and righting wrongs.

The clam just sets -- and gets along,

It's all the same to the clam.